#24

Dear Jellybean,

I actually write to you everyday, wondering how your day is or if anything memorable happened. I write it in a journal of sorts, just so that I am able to inform you of how I’m doing and what’s on my mind at the time. I also like to think that my writings will bring you back with me, almost as if you were there when I wrote them. I can barely imagine the day that we’ll be able to read them together. It seems almost unreal.

I like to believe that I’m romantic. I’ll write you a quick poem or some song lyrics that pop into my mind and place them in random spots for you to find. Should there be distance, expect to receive random texts or a short video message that I’ve prepared for you. I’ve already planned out some things that we’d be doing together, which is strange, seeing as I’m not usually structured.

I imagine waking you up with a pillow fight, of course with feather pillows. I’m not a violent person, but I will attack you with as many pillows as I can that morning. Don’t go easy on me. While the feathers are tossed all around in the air and you’re distracted, I will pounce on you. Or, who knows? Maybe you’ll sneak up on me?

I imagine us going into a bookstore or library and picking out our favorite books that we read as children. We’ll go to a corner and sit on the floor. You’ll wrap your arms around me as I shake my head at your impeccable taste in childhood literature. I’ll read your favorite book aloud, then you’ll read mine. If children happen to come over and listen to us, we can portray the different characters in the books and read aloud to them.

I imagine us with our friends, creating a hilarious musical for our local supermarket. It’ll probably be horrifying and embarrassing, but if we’re able to make at least one person smile, it will definitely be worth it.

I imagine us playing video games, despite my lack of skill. You’ll sit behind me and guide me to go whichever way I’m supposed to. If something randomly pops up on the screen, I’ll probably jump and hand you the controller. You’ll laugh at me as you continue the game, while my head is buried into your shoulder. However, if we’re playing a racing game against each other, I will not go easy on you. But if you’re good at racing games, please go easy on me. I think that they’re the only games that I possibly stand a chance at.

I imagine us going around town and making strangers smile. I love to make people smile, so we’ll have to find those with frowns on their faces and do all that we can to have them beaming at us. Maybe we can change the world one smile at a time? With you, anything’s possible.

I imagine us bowling, either alone or with our friends. There will definitely be some sort of competition. While I can be competitive, I am a great loser. I’ll proclaim myself as the Most Improved Player, while you’ll always be my MVP.

I imagine us mini-golfing, star-gazing, painting, trying different restaurants, walking around our city like tourists, enjoying the beach, falling asleep, waking up next to each other, holding hands, snuggling, texting, calling, loving one another, and anything else that you can think of.

While I’m into the cutesy romantic aspects of a relationship, there’s still reality that we have to face. There will be arguments, tears, hard work; but we will always find a way to fight through it and grow stronger. We will have passion, a magnetic draw to each other. We will be real.

There’s always the question: Would you rather have loved, then lost? Or never have loved at all? I would never deny myself the chance to love someone, even if we don’t end up together.

Love is magical, real, the finest pleasure of life. I already love you. I just can’t wait for the moment to fall in love with you. For that to happen, I need to find you or you find me. When we meet, wrap your arms around me and never let me go. I promise to do the same.

But until then,

xoxo
Vi